Thank You Mom!

Mom in her 20's

Three years ago I wrote the blog below.  I was so happy and sad, as while my Mom was in Sedona for our wedding we noticed something was not quite right with her.  Because of that, Hunny and I canceled our Honeymoon trip and went to Minnesota for an extended period of time so that I could see what was going on with my her.   



By October of 2015 she was diagnosed with Diabetes and Dementia and the doctor recommended we move her to an apartment in an Assisted Living facility.  During the remainder of 2015 thru 2017 my Mom had to deal with three moves until she settled in a place that seems to work for her and us.  It was not an easy few years. I am the person who has been responsible for her finances and had to take a few trips to Minnesota to help arrange things.  Thank God for my nieces and my cousin as I could not have dealt with those first two years on my own.  

I was quite surprised at the amount of grief, sadness and anger I had to deal with during that time.  It was almost like I lost my own life for a while.  I realize now I was grieving the loss of the Mother I knew, the one that was always strong!  The one that was always there for me!  It was time for me to be there for her and living so far away made it difficult.  My brothers have now stepped up to provide more support and assistance and I am so grateful for that.   

Connie and Ted Garcia

My Mom is doing quite well now.  She has a good support system around her and has been in the same facility for almost a year.  She is happy and only wishes she could see all of her children more.  In short conversations I do not notice the dementia and she allows that wisdom of hers to surface when I need her too.  We are blessed she is still with us and managing quite well.  She still remembers all of us and I pray that continues as long as possible

Mom at her 80th Birthday in 2015

In honor of her and another Mothers Day I share this blog again.
In Gratitude, Linda G
  


May 10, 2015

To my Mom, Thank You!

I was married two weeks ago today, and was so happy that my Mother was able to attend the wedding.  I live in Sedona, Arizona and my Mom lives in St Paul, Minnesota.  She has never been much of a traveler and when she did travel it was with my Dad. (Usually by car.)  My Dad passed on, almost seven years ago and in that time she has only traveled once and it was by car.  For my Mom to take a plane and travel into the mountains took her way out of her comfort zone.  But she did it!  To attend my wedding and be there for me, even though she did not understand it, meant more than I can say. (It was an outdoor wedding not blessed by the Catholic Church.)  Special thanks to my cousins for traveling with her. 

I do not think she has any clue as to how much of an inspiration she has been to me.  She was born in the US but grew up in Mexico.  She moved to Minnesota at the age of 21, pregnant and running for her life.  Her first husband was abusive, and she felt if she wanted her and her child (my sister) to have a good life she needed to leave him.  She had family in Minnesota and thus journeyed there.  I can’t imagine the strength and courage that must have taken.  Moving to a new country where they spoke a different language. She is a strong and determined woman and had a wonderfully successful life and marriage.

No she was not perfect!  But never for a moment in my entire life have I ever doubted that she loved me.  I believe that is one of the most important gifts a parent can give us, Love completely, totally and unconditionally.  Doesn’t mean she approved of or liked everything we did, but she always loved us.

It takes courage to be a Mom and raise your children with as much love as you can muster.  I never had a child of my own, but helped my Sister with her children.  Being an Auntie is important too, so whether you are a Mom or an Aunt, know that the love you share with a child is one of the most important gifts you will ever give.

To my Mom, Thank you for being the best Mom you could be for me and my siblings.  Thanks for showing us to be strong and stand up for ourselves and to be loving and kind and help others when in need. Thanks for the encouragement and even the push to do more and be more and for teaching us by example.

Whether your Mom was as strong as mine or not, I trust that she loved and took care of you in the best way she could.  Forgive her weaknesses and honor her strengths.  Love her like you desire to be loved.  Allow any healing to occur.  And if you are a parent love your children to the nth degree.

With much gratitude on this and every Mothers Day.

Linda G